There is a part of me that wishes I knew nothing about the grief and mourning of a miscarriage. I have two beautiful daughters, Taylor (born in 1995) and Leah (born in 1998). When Leah was born, I had a tubal ligation while in the hospital. Over the years, the Lord revealed truth to me and my husband and we began to realize the value of children and the reality of the scripture in Psalms 127:3-5a which says, “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them…”
On September 26, 2007, we felt compelled by the Lord to have a tubal reversal. In less than a month, we were expecting a baby. How I wish I could express our joy and elation that God had answered our prayer so quickly! God does honor obedience. Nonetheless, two weeks after confirming the pregnancy, we experienced a miscarriage. My family was devastated. I can only tell you the emotions that I personally felt. It was the feeling of deep loss, a sense of emptiness and an over-powering sorrow. Writing these words still brings tears and a quickening in my heart. I remember thinking that my baby was gone…really gone. One day I was expecting a child and the next, it was to be no more.
Some people sent cards and others tried to express their sympathies, but nothing could quite take the edge off of the loss of this child. As Hannah said in I Samuel 1:27a, “For this child I prayed…” It seemed to me as if a loss had occurred but there was nothing to acknowledge the life of this child. If our baby would have lived, he/she would have been a child and later an adult. God tells us in Jeremiah 1:5a, “Before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee…” Psalms 139:13b-14a tells us that God “…has covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” Surely, there had to be more to the reality that a child had been lost. I experienced this feeling again as people began to flounder with words of sympathy, commented on their awkwardness in knowing what to do or said nothing. I immediately felt the need to do something, anything.
Although the live birth of a baby was not then realized, the birth of a ministry was. I knew in my heart that if I felt the need to acknowledge and recognize the life of this baby, there surely were others who felt the same about a child they lost. Likewise, I began to seek a way to minister to women who have miscarried or have lost a child in another way. We do not have to be afraid for our baby. II Corinthians says, “We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.” Nonetheless, Jesus feels our pain when we experience the loss of a loved one. When He saw the place where His friend, Lazarus, was buried and looked upon the tears in the eyes of Lazarus’ sisters, John 11:35 says, “Jesus wept.” He bears our sorrows and offers us comfort. Matthew 11:28, 30 encourages us with these words of Jesus: “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
The Lord impressed upon me a ministry entitled Remember Me that could help women who have experienced the grief of miscarriage and are looking for a way to acknowledge the life of their child and create a remembrance for their family. Miscarriage is not the end of things for the believer. We, too, will be present with the Lord and therefore, together with our loved ones who have gone on before.
Remember Me offers items that will hopefully bring comfort to a grieving mother and family. I have designed a handmade ornament that conveys what is in a mother’s heart when she loses a baby. Isaiah 49:15a-16b was the cry of my heart. It reads, “…yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands…” We also offer a framed scripture of this verse as well as a sterling silver ring that is engraved with “Remember Me.” Specialized cards that convey sympathy for the loss of a child will be available, as well. All of our products have one or all of the following aspects: the verse from Isaiah 49, a baby’s handprint, or the words, “Remember Me.” We are continuing to add products as the Lord leads. May each item bring peace, comfort and assurance for the days ahead.
In His Hands,